


My Last Two Brain Cells Took a Nap and Now We're Here

by pinegreenapples



Series: Modern AU [6]
Category: Ranger's Apprentice - John Flanagan
Genre: 3 am thoughts, Gen, bros being dumb as shit, halt is so done, this is my love letter to rangers incorrect quotes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-28
Updated: 2019-07-28
Packaged: 2020-07-23 12:21:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,296
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20008210
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pinegreenapples/pseuds/pinegreenapples
Summary: Halt was never worried about whether or not Gilan and Will would get along. Both boys were quite affable and easy going, and while Will was still skittish in his new home, he had a feeling that the two of them would grow close as the summer went on. Even after Will had beaned Gilan with a Nerf dart to the cheek.“Hey. Hey Will. If you work on a farm and your job is to take care of chickens, you are a chicken tender.”Will gasped long and loud. Halt frowned down at his report, what the hell-“Yoooooooooooo!!!!! Gil you’re so right!!!!”Although, on second thought, Halt really should’ve been worried.





	My Last Two Brain Cells Took a Nap and Now We're Here

Halt was never worried about whether or not Gilan and Will would get along. Both boys were quite affable and easy going, and while Will was still skittish in his new home, he had a feeling that the two of them would grow close as the summer went on. Even after Will had beaned Gilan with a Nerf dart to the cheek. 

“Hey. Hey Will. If you work on a farm and your job is to take care of chickens, you are a chicken tender.”

Will gasped long and loud. Halt frowned down at his report, _what the hell-_

“Yoooooooooooo!!!!! Gil you’re so right!!!!”

Although, on second thought, Halt really should’ve been worried.

***

Most mornings for Halt were often blessedly silent. Will was an early riser but he wasn’t exactly a _cognizant_ early riser and seeing a ghost was more likely than finding Gilan out of bed before eleven. However, today was different.

One day, every July, Halt set aside time for himself and Gilan to go to the amusement park. It had started back when Gilan was barely 12 and had more energy than a pika who had chugged ten red bulls in a spite fueled dare. Halt had figured that an amusement park was a worthy investment that would burn off at least five of the red bulls and he hadn’t been wrong.

Gilan had spent so much energy running around from ride to ride that he went to bed early that night and Halt had a wondrously quiet time reading in the living room. Halt decided then and there that the amusement park trip was now a necessity for each summer he had Gilan, if only for the potential of peace and quiet for one night.

At seventeen, Gilan was considerably less of an energetic mess that vibrated if left without something to do for too long, but the trip out to the amusement park had become a tradition to him and so, Halt was obligated to set a date and go.

This year, Will would be accompanying them and Gilan was thrilled at the prospect of finally having someone to ride the rides with him. Halt, knowing his limits, had only ever gone on the whirli-gig for its slow movements and gentle circular motion. Occasionally, Crowley had joined them but Crowley could only handle so much before he also had to bow out. 

Due to the excitement of the day, Gilan had actually woken up early and was seated at the table with a zombie-like Will eating eggs. Halt pulled the last of waffles out of the waffle maker and set the plate on the kitchen table.

“Thanks, Halt!” Gilan smiled up at him and reached for a waffle. Will grunted out something that could’ve been English and also reached for a waffle.

Halt snorted at the two of them as Gilan began to drown his waffle in syrup and Will tore into his completely plain. After a few bites it seemed like Will was beginning to finally perk up. Halt went back to the stove, collected the bacon, and was about to reenter the dining room when Will spoke up.

“You know, if you think about it, waffles are just thick pancakes with abs.”

Halt felt his brain screech to a stop. 

Gilan snorted. Then he giggled. He broke out in a full peal of laughter and kept going for the full minute it took Halt’s brain to reboot.

“Oh my goodness, Will, you’re so right! They are! How did I never notice?”

Halt saw will shrug. “You just never let the subconscious rule your waking thoughts for more than a few minutes.”

“Well damn, now I gotta try it!”

Will nodded and the two of them went back to eating.

Halt took advantage of the quiet to slip back in with the bacon and start in on his own breakfast. He managed to get two bites of his eggs in before Gilan spoke up again.

“Wait, if waffles are thick pancakes with abs, what does that make crepes? Are they the twinks of the pancake family?”

Halt pinched the bridge of his nose. 

***

“Will! Gilan! Come on we’re going to the hardware store!” Halt called.

There was a loud thump from Will’s room followed by a yelp and hurried footsteps. Another thump and more footsteps joined the first set.

 _There’s one_ , Halt thought as Gilan came skidding around the corner in his sock feet. _Aaaaaand, there’s two_ , he thought as Will tried to run around the corner, slipped, faceplanted, and got up grinning.

“Shoes, the both of you. Preferably closed toed. We’re buying bricks for the garden walkway.”

“You have a garden?” Gilan hopped past with a sneaker.

“Yes, I have a garden, Gilan.” Halt glared at the teenager.

“Yeah, it’s the rectangle by the two oaks that has all the dandelions in it. Halt says they compliment the petunias he put in.” Will plopped himself on the floor and started to loosen his shoelaces.

Halt stared balefully at the middle schooler sitting in his hallway. “Yes, _thank you_ , Will.”

“Huh, I always thought that was just a patch you let grow over from the first owner.” Gilan straightened and moved closer to the door.

Halt swung his glare back around to Gilan. Gilan’s cheer didn’t diminish in the slightest.

“But hey, to each their own!” He sidled past Halt and went to sit in the passenger’s seat.

Will got up and followed Halt out the door, dogging his step with questions.

“What color are we buying? Are they gonna be straight or wavy? I like the wavy ones I think they’re cool! Ooh, are we gonna get to put them down? I’ve never done that before! How do you make a garden walkway anyway? Do you dig little holes and then put the bricks in there or do you just set them down on the dirt?”

“Red, straight, yes, and I’ll show you later.”

“Okay!” Will bounded into the vehicle like a puppy that had been told it was going for a walk and practically vibrated in his seat the whole drive there.

***

While Will and Gilan had behaved themselves on the ride over, they seemed to have forgotten all their manners once they entered the store. They buzzed around from display to display, picking up items and cracking jokes. Halt tried to ignore them and kept on a steady course for the bricks. The boys followed him, but at a more sedate pace.

When they did catch up to him, he was already loading packages of bricks into the car. Will, helpful as ever, came over to aid him while Gilan hung back and snagged a display brick off the shelf.

“You know, bricks are just domesticated rocks.”

Halt closed his eyes and fought off the urge to lay his head down on the cart handle.

“Nu-uh! What do think pet rocks are if they aren’t domesticated rocks?” Will countered, crossing his arms. 

“Can I please have one day without your nonsense. Both of you. One day. That’s all I ask. Please. Just one. A singular day,” Halt broke in just before the two of them could really get going. Both heads swiveled towards him. Will, a bit sheepish, Gilan, utterly unrepentant and clearly not done with the topic at hand. 

Halt saw the gears turn in Gilan’s head and belatedly moved to cut him off. “Don’t-”

“What if pet rocks are kinda like monkeys though? Like, they’re similar to the domesticated version but they’re not quite there.”

“Wait, but wouldn’t they be more like Neanderthals, then?”

“An excellent point!”

Halt sighed and started to push the cart towards the check out. Maybe if he walked fast enough he could lose them and have a peaceful ride back.


End file.
